Dear Diary · Life · Lovee

Moving Day!

Ugh. You guys, this is so bitter sweet. Today is the last day in our apartment!! I really don’t know why I get so emotional about it but I do… I mean, this is where Paul and I started dating. Where we had our first Christmas, our first fight, where we discovered so much about ourselves. This is hard for me guys! WAH!

I remember the first meal we shared together as a couple. We were sitting on my kitchen counter (I didn’t have a dining room set) with a set of chopsticks and some shaking beef from one of my favorite thai restaurants. That was also the night Paul and I stayed up way too late talking about our past… the good, the bad and the ugly. I will never forget that night, because that was the night I realized… I couldn’t live without him.

So many memories. So much growth. So much love has been shared in this apartment.

Our (old) complex has this beautiful pool area with gorgeous palm trees, a big grill area and a hot tub. Ohhhh the hot tub…. The hot tub was a place where we would go talk through things. If we had a disagreement or if we were stressed beyond measure, we’d pour a (very large) glass of wine and sit in the hot tub to talk it out. It’s where he told me about his childhood growing up in England. It’s where I cried my eyes out because I missed my grandmother who passed away a few years ago. It’s where we would discuss career growth and ambition. It’s where we first brought up the idea of marriage and having children one day.

This apartment means a lot to me. I remember the first time Paul looked me in the eyes and said “I love you” (I literally just got butterflies as I wrote that) … AND now the tears are coming. FUCK. ME. We were only there for 18 months, but it feels like 2 lifetimes.

Babe… there are things I will never forget about this place. The way you looked at me the first time you saw me getting all dolled up, those snuggles on that little couch we hated so much, making you breakfast and coffee to bring to work when we worked together. I remember going to Ikea for the first time with you… we walked through the entire store picking out décor and furniture for OUR apartment when you moved in. I remember when you walked into the living room with flowers while I was getting ready for my graduation (I cried). The breakfast wars, pizza cook offs, and many nights where we would pig out on chicken wings, potato chips, and ice-cream sundaes.

We had our first (of many) Halloween parties, I remember hanging Christmas decorations on the tree for our first Christmas, hosting Easter dinner for my family, you waking up in the middle of the night, pulling me close, and saying “I love you more than anything in the world” and falling back asleep… sitting in the hot tub for hours talking about the past and making plans for the future, dinners at the pool, long walks around the lake, dinner at courtside and most of all involuntarily falling in love with a man I never expected to.

I’m going to miss this place so much but I am beyond excited for the next chapter.

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